Toss the Salad

Anyone who has spent much time with me over the years will not be surprised by this statement.  I don't have much use for salads.  I know they are the meal of choice for many dieters.  But, even when I was on relatively successful diets - like Weight Watchers - I never cared for salads.  This is something I was thinking about because I had salads the last two days at lunch.  Both times, I left the meal feeling unsatisfied and a little frustrated.  This resentment of salads has existed for a long time.  Originally it was based on the fact I wanted to eat more destructive foods.  (And I had a bizarre inability to process lettuce.  It gave me some of the worst indigestion I would get.  But that has gone away.)  Now, though, I still don't care for them.

1. They are not filling.  Unless you are getting one of those salads that have no nutritional value at all - the ones that have quesadillas and sweet and sour chicken on them - most salads you get are horribly unsatisfying.  You may get this huge bowl, full of lots of green stuff.  You may even walk away full, thanks to the quantity of food.  But it burns off so quickly it is almost a joke.
2. The toppings are a minefield.  The standard salad now comes loaded with cheese and croutons and other stuff.  But they skimp on the good stuff.  The one I got today, for example, had four cherry tomatoes and two slices of cucumber.  If I hadn't spent and extra three bucks for chicken, it would have been a disaster.  Ordinarily, people wouldn't notice the dearth of toppings due to the avalanche of cheese and croutons - but I don't get that on mine.
3. Their health claims are dubious.  By the time they get to taste great, they have been slathered with dressing and all other stuff.  Sure, you can make a great salad.  But what do you have to add to do that?  Oriental noodles, bacon, eggs, cheese, chili, sour cream, dressing.  How healthy is that, actually?  Take a chef salad - by the time you load it up with everything, it isn't much of a health food.
4. The meat on top is often wimpy.  Three bucks for a chicken patty.  It was probably four ounces of chicken.  That is pretty standard at most places.  If they put chicken or mahi mahi or shrimp on a salad, it is a dinky amount.   That is in stark contrast to the fact they'll cram a bag of lettuce into a bowl for these things.  There have places I got salads where I actually ate the top layer of toppings and lettuce and left half the rabbit food in the bowl.

Now, admittedly, there are some places that offer great salad.  Steak and Shake actually had one that was amazing.  It had chicken and fruit and all that.  I like dried fruit, apples, oranges, nuts on my salad.  So places that have something like a harvest salad with all that stuff is great.  But they often still rely on some of the cheaper and easier ingredients.  I tried Wendy's salad the other day with pecans, chicken, apples, cranberries (without the bleu cheese).  They had a ton of dried cranberries in the bowl.  They were everywhere.  But the bag of pecans they gave me was pitiful - as were the apples.  And the chicken breast was predictably tiny.  McAllister's Deli has some great salads - they are always well proportioned in their toppings, dressing, lettuce.  Plus you can do the whole "Pick Two" option and pair it with a big cup of soup or chili.  

I have found that salads are actually a terrible option for me.  I am always hungry afterwards, which then puts me in the place where I have to fight the urge to snack all afternoon.  Today was no exception.  I had a big peach, a banana, cashews, mixed nuts, and then another half banana.  The salad doesn't stick with me very long.  It almost seems like the lettuce just vaporizes and I'm left with whatever was on top - which in many cases is not much.  There are times where I get a salad because it is just easier than trying to find something on a menu.  That was the case at Wendy's.  But I would far prefer to eat soup than salad at a meal.  Thankfully a lot of places are offering a soup and salad option.  Chili's, Olive Garden, Red Lobster, Jason's Deli.  The first three have all you can eat of both, so you can fill up on the heartier soups.  (Boston Market just bypassed the salad route all together and do all you can eat soup - for three bucks.  Heck yeah.)

I'm sure a ton of people love salad and have benefitted from eating them.  And I have found them useful over the years.  I just don't think they are actually that great.