When you are battling any addiction, having milestones is essential. Each benchmark passed is an encouragement to keep going. It is kind of like those auto-save features on a video game. The goal is that if you slip a little, you never go back past that point. It gives you an extra push to keep moving forward. That is why recovering addicts mark the days, months, years of sobriety. It is a way to celebrate how far they have come. But it also is a way to provide strength in weaker moments. Sometimes the only thing that stops you from snarfing down a jelly donut is that it will ruin a benchmark.
I've had tons of these during this process. For me, losing 50 pounds, hitting 300 pounds, hitting 280 were all personal victories for me. But there was one benchmark that was the most important to me. 100 pounds. That truly was my only goal. I wanted to lose 100 pounds in the first year. And honestly, if that was all I could lose, I would be happy. It was more important than hitting 250 or 220 or even 200. If I lost 100 pounds, then I would have truly accomplished something incredible. I've been drifting downward lately. And, frankly, I was worried that I would actually meet my goal.
Today, though, I hit it. We were traveling yesterday, which was my usual four week check-in day. So this morning I had to weigh at my in-laws' house. I hate using different scales because they all seem to weigh in their own unique style. So when the scale popped up "254.6" I was dubious. I got off and walked around and then got on again. "254.6" I went out and asked my mother-in-law how accurate her scale was. I had used it once before and it was pretty close to ours. She said it was comparable to her doctor's scale. I was still nervous. It wasn't just 100 pounds that it hit; it actually was 101 pounds. Heather and her mom tried to convince me that it was probably right. I couldn't believe it because that meant that I had dropped over five pounds in the last four weeks.
Five pounds?!? Over the holidays? While driving 800 miles in the last five days? That doesn't compute. Sure, I'm not eating holiday goodies. But I have been having the occasional latte. However, one thing I have learned over this process is to not try to figure out the weight loss. It comes in spurts. It stops and starts. No rhyme or reason. So I figured that even if the scale was off by a pound - or even a pound and a half - it would still be 100 pounds.
I'm not gonna lie to you, I threw my arms up in the air and was very very happy.
But, this is far from over. So, what's next? I reached my goal almost a month early (28 days to be exact). My game plan had been to hit 100 pounds on diet alone, if possible. Then I would add in exercise. So that is that next step. When we get back to Tallahassee at the first of the year, I will start walking and using the Wii Fit again. I'll see how that goes and if I can find a way to work more stuff into my tight schedule. People have asked what my ultimate goal is. I don't really know. The only number I had in my head was 100 pounds. I am going to go as far as I can take this. My diet is set. I am not going to make small alterations just to drop a pound or two. I am very comfortable with how I am eating. It is easy to maintain and it is pretty healthy. So now I will see how much I can drop by adding in exercise. The number floating around in my head is 220. If I can drop another 30 pounds in the next year, I would be happy. If I could hit 200, I would be ecstatic. I know the BMI charts say 180 is ideal - but I am not going to be ultra-restrictive and regimented to get there. Today, though, is a day for celebrating. 100 pounds. Thank you God.
