McDonald's, I Loathe Thee

Dear McDonalds, You are poisoning the world with your food. 

And thanks for a delicious breakfast. I hate you. Nathan

- From Nathan Fillion's Twitter Account (actor on Firefly and Castle)

I thought that this quote was funny, because it popped up the same day that I was about to write this posting.  I have felt this way about Mickey D's for a long time.  I knew that it was horrible for me.  I could feel myself getting fatter every time that I went in there.  Things like the movie Supersize Me didn't help.  But, somehow I couldn't shake the draw to the Golden Arches.  We never went to McDonald's growing up.  My parents were Burger King people.  In fact, my mom went so far as to try poisoning our mind to McDonald's by telling us that their burgers were made of chopped up worms.  (That is the complete truth - she actually said that.)  It also didn't help the McD's cause when they took forever for a special order.

I have always been picky about my burgers.  I don't eat ketchup, mustard, pickles, or raw onions.  Over time, I started to eat mayo - but not as a kid.  I liked cheese and bacon on my burger.  That was it.  McDonald's put all kinds of junk on their burgers, and they took like twenty minutes to make one fresh without that stuff on it.  Burger King didn't do that.  We had no reason to go to McDonald's.  Their worm burgers took forever to make they way we wanted them.  So it wasn't an option.  We finally started going once in a while when they built one eight blocks from our house - and when they introduced McNuggets.

But McDonald's has a way with people - it sucks you in.  It is like the Fast Food Mafia.  Soon, I had discovered their breakfast sandwiches.  My mom started getting them for me every Saturday on the way back from the grocery store.  Then, in high school, I realized that my mom was full of it - and the burgers were actually pretty good.  That combined with their Jurassic Park and Olympic promotions.  I started eating Mickey D's quite frequently.

When I went to UCF, they built a McDonald's literally right across the street from the school.  It opened right before I enrolled (a little before the Burger King a couple blocks away).  I ate there a LOT.  They had free student drinks.  Then they had tons of coupons for free Arch Deluxes when that aborted effort was being launched.  My friends and I ate there all the time.  When I moved off campus, my last house was across the street from another McDonald's.  I stopped there almost every morning on my way to my internship for breakfast.

This was also when I started having major acid reflux problems.  I didn't know what was going on - just that I felt horrible.  I missed days from internship, or left early a few times.  I honestly had no clue that my atrocious diet was wrecking havoc with my digestive system - that combined with my quickly escalating and undiagnosed egg allergy.  Even with all of that, McDonald's was just too easy to keep in my life.

When people think about McDonald's there are certain things that come to mind.  Reliability and affordability are two of them.  That is what made the chain explode in popularity in the 1950s.  You could go anywhere in the country and get the same quality and price.  Sure, that quality was mediocre at best.  But at least it wasn't awful.  Now, McDonald's is almost the benchmark for affordable dining out.  I know that in our family, we have a saying when we try a restaurant.  "Cheaper Than McDonald's (CTM)"  A dining establishment will get a ringing endorsement if somehow the bill is less than we would pay at McDonald's.  It is not easy to find these places - but there are some out there.  [In Orlando, Uncle Al's Hot Dogs was one of them.  In Tallahassee we have a few places.  Our school discount card makes Tijuana Flats and Pepper's Mexican Grill CTM.  With free kids' meals on the weekends, Steak and Shake becomes CTM.  Black Bean Cuban Cafe always has free kids meals.  Boston Market is always CTM.]

There are two other qualities associated with McDonald's: Kid Friendly and Marketability.  Mickey D's has some of the best marketing in the world.  There ads are everywhere.  They have had songs on commercials that were virtually radio hits.  And their Kids Meal tie-ins have been legendary.  That adds to the kid friendly label.  Most of the big family movies end up going through McDonald's.  They have cool toys and promotional things like glasses.  Plus the McNugget cannot be matched in the pantheon of addictive foods for kids.  Josiah, when he was younger, could spot a McDonald's anywhere.  Gabe is the same way.  If I was to ask the kids right now where they wanted to go to dinner, even odds would be that they picked McDonald's.  It doesn't matter if they went there yesterday or even this morning, they would cheer if I asked them about going for dinner.  As parents, it is hard to find a place the kids are so happy to eat.

So it becomes very difficult to avoid interacting with McDonald's.  But, for me, I have come to the place where I hate McDonald's.  I'm not talking about the normal parental burnout.  I'm saying that I actually detest the place.  When I take the kids, I don't even order anything any more.  I'll sit there and watch everyone eat and get something at home.  Part of it is that there is virtually nothing on the menu I can have.  I mean, look at the foods I could even possibly eat there.  Grilled Chicken sandwich (without the bread), apple dippers, chicken caesar salad, yogurt fruit parfait, and their new fruit smoothies (which are okay - but not that great).  That's it.  While that may seem like a decent option, that brings up the second problem.

Their "healthy" food options are horribly expensive.  The chicken sandwich is almost four bucks.  It seems like a big sandwich, until you take off the football sized bun.  Then it is a pretty pitiful excuse for a chicken breast.  Plus it is jammed full of water and sodium.  The apple dippers are "only" a dollar.  Super, until you realize it is only about a half of an apple's worth of slices.  The yogurt parfait is maybe the size of kid's yogurt with a smattering of fruit.  All of their salads come with cheese on them - plus other stuff.  The caesar is the only one "plain enough" for me - and then you get to top it with their inferior chicken.  The fruit smoothie isn't the worst thing ever - and it is yogurt and fruit.  But it is almost three bucks for a small!  So, if you want to eat healthy at McDonald's, you have to pay through the nose for it.

So, McDonald's tries to position their other food as healthy.  They pitch their McNuggets as a healthy option.  (Only 420 calories for 10!)  DEEP FRIED PROCESSED CHICKEN IS HEALTHY?!?  I can't blame them, per se.  They honestly tried to do things differently.  I remember a few years back, McDonald's introduced a whole line of salads and healthier options.  (Salad Shaker, anyone?)  After a year or so, they quietly made an announcement that they were pulling most of the promos.  There was not interest to justify the new items.  The opposition to McDonald's is always loud.  They scream about how unhealthy the food it.  But then, when the new options were put out there, it turned out there were fewer opponents than everyone thought - they were just very loud.   [SIDE NOTE: That is the same thing Apple is facing right now.  The media makes things out to be huge whenever someone is upset with Apple.  But the number of people is actually small.  Apple sold 4 million iPhone 4 units in the first month.  Only 20,000 people had problems with their antennae.  That is under 1%.  With all the news coverage, you would have thought it was 50%, right?]

One of my bigger frustrations in my weight battle has been that even if I can fight the cravings and addictions, I can't find the culture.  Between traveling and the crazy schedule everyone has, there are just times when we have to eat out.  If you want to eat fast, it is virtually impossible to eat healthy.  If you want to eat healthy, you cannot eat fast - and you often have to pay a tip, which jacks the price up more. McDonald's just capitalizes on the fast paced way of life.  In that regard, they aren't any different than Burger King, Taco Bell, KFC, or any of a hundred other places.  But they certainly do seem to capitalize on that mindset - even encourage it.  And I swear, there is some kind of chemical they put in their McNuggets that make kids crave them all the time.  For now, I am letting my frustration with McDonald's manifest itself as hatred.

FAST CASUAL SHOWDOWN: Burgers

A while back I posted a disheartening look at the fast food industry. It was put into motion by KFC's introduction of the atrocious Double Down Sandwich. What I did was put together nutritional information for what I usually ordered at a fast food restaurant. It was kind of startling - just how bad those foods are for you. I had several people mention the article and how it really reminded them how bad fast food was for them.

It also triggered something in my head. Is fast food worse than other food options? When we abandon fast food, we usually end up in restaurants that are classified as "fast casual" dining by the industry. They used to be called "family restaurants." It is usually a sit down place, with a wait staff and a menu. But it, theoretically, offers better options. There is a tremendous series of books out there called "Eat This . . . Not That." Naturally, I avoided those books like the plague when I was eating under my old rules (Rule 1: If it tastes good, eat it.). Now, though, I have found some of the material in this series useful. ETNT has even merged itself with Men's Fitness online to offer nutritional guides.

Anyway, ETNT highlights just how bad some of the fast casual options are, as well. So what I decided to do was start a series where I compared fast casual food offerings. Targeting fast food is like shooting fish in a barrel. (The city are the fish, the people are the barrel. I can't ever hear that phrase without thinking of Tommy Boy.) I tried to pick a range of national chains, but I know that is hard. Restaurants have weird expansion options. And there are tons of places in Texas and California that I have never tried or heard of. Most of these are places that I have seen in other states, or seen advertise nationally. I have also put up some non-traditional choices. The lineup will change based on what food I am profiling.

For the first showdown, I will look at burgers. If we don't go to fast food places to get their horrible burgers, then we have to go to a fast casual place to get them. Are they actually any better? Here are nine restaurants and how they measure up. For a point of reference, I have included one of the fast food places as well.

• Applebees
• Beef O'Brady's
• Chili's
• Denny's
• Five Guys
• Friendly's
• Red Robin
• Ruby Tuesday
• Ted's Montana Grill
• Wendy's

For this comparison, I included some national chains (Applebee's, Chili's, Denny's, Friendly's, Ruby Tuesday) and four large regional chains (Beefs, Five Guys, Red Robin, Ted's). I used Five Guys because it is strictly a burger joint. Red Robin is known for its burgers. And Ted's, which offers bison meat, often positions itself as a healthier option to beef burgers. Here's the basics of the challenge. I took one burger, one common side, and a Coke from each place and compared them. The Coke at each place was identical, and did NOT include any refills. The burger I chose was not a plain normal one, either. It was a signature one that people would usually order. I didn't intentionally pick the worst one. I picked one that I, as a fat food addict, would seriously consider ordering.

I also included an appetizer and dessert in a separate comparison. Why? Well, because fast casual places offer those - something most fast food places don't. And a lot of times, we will eat an entire meal - which includes appetizer and dessert. Again, I didn't skimp on the choices of those things, either. I picked mozzarella sticks at every place that had them, since that was a common item to order. And for dessert, it was a standard sized one - not a tiny shot glass size. One additional note: I tried to use TGI Friday's as one of the places. However, they do not make their nutritional information available online. That bothers me. I feel any restaurant that refuses to make that info available is trying to hide something. And, for that, I have lost even more respect for them. Well, if I had any to start with - which I didn't. On to the showdown.

DAILY RECOMMENDED DAILY ALLOWANCE
2000 calories, 65 g fat, 2400 mg sodium, 300 g carbs, 50 g protein

APPLEBEE'S
Mozzarella Sticks, Quesadilla Burger, Fries, Coke, Chocolate Chip Cookie Sundae
ENTREE ONLY: 2010 Calories, 123 g Fat, 4490 mg Sodium, 147 g carbs, 82 g protein
WITH APP & DESSERT: 4610 Calories, 251 g Fat, 8240 mg Sodium, 455 g carbs, 144 g protein

BEEF O'BRADY'S
Fried Mozzarella, Cheeseburger Wrap, Curly Fries, Coke, Chocolate Eruption Cake
ENTREE ONLY: 1508 Calories, 78 g Fat, 2625 mg Sodium, 145 g carbs, 58 g protein
WITH APP & DESSERT: 2888 Calories, 158 g Fat, 4457 mg Sodium, 280 g carbs, 90 g protein

CHILI'S
Fried Cheese, Classic Bacon Burger, Homestyle Fries, Coke, White Chocolate Molten Cake
ENTREE ONLY: 2090 Calories, 104 g Fat, 4850 mg Sodium, 221 g carbs, 68 g protein
WITH APP & DESSERT: 4400 Calories, 255 g Fat, 7340 mg Sodium, 413 g carbs, 116 g protein

DENNY'S
Mozzarella Sticks, Double Cheeseburger, Seasoned Fries, Coke, French Silk Pie
ENTREE ONLY: 2180 Calories, 121 g Fat, 3520 mg Sodium, 151 g carbs, 116 g protein
WITH APP & DESSERT: 3700 Calories, 218 g Fat, 6190 mg Sodium, 405 g carbs, 138 g protein

FIVE GUYS
Bacon Cheeseburger, Regular Fries, Coke - they don't offer appetizers or dessert
ENTREE ONLY: 1730 Calories, 92 g Fat, 1410 mg Sodium, 169 g carbs, 61 g protein

FRIENDLY'S
Mini Mozzarella Sticks, Ultimate Grilled Cheese Burger Melt, Waffle Fries, Coke, 3 Scoop Resee's PB Cup Sundae
ENTREE ONLY: 2280 Calories, 130 g Fat, 3530 mg Sodium, 219 g carbs, 58 g protein
WITH APP & DESSERT: 3850 Calories, 222 g Fat, 5780 mg Sodium, 364 g carbs, 98 g protein

RED ROBIN
Jump Starter Cheese Sticks, Royal Red Robin Burger (with egg, bacon, cheese), Steak Fries, Coke, Mountain High Mudd Pie
ENTREE ONLY: 1820 Calories, 101 g Fat, 2567 mg Sodium, 163 g carbs, 65 g protein
WITH APP & DESSERT: 3796 Calories, 197 g Fat, 4817 mg Sodium, 395 g carbs, 110 g protein

RUBY TUESDAY
Fried Mozzarella, Triple Prime Bacon Cheddar Burger, Piping Hot Fries, Coke, Blondie for One
ENTREE ONLY: 2031 Calories, 133 g Fat, 3873 mg Sodium, 146 g carbs, no protein numbers
WITH APP & DESSERT: 2838 Calories, 171 g Fat, 4576 mg Sodium, 243 g carbs

TED's MONTANA GRILL
Bowl of Bison Chili, Kitchen Sink Bison Burger, Onion Rings, Coke, Strawberry Shortcake
ENTREE ONLY: 1850 Calories, 96 g Fat, 5874 mg Sodium, 140 g carbs, 58 g protein
WITH APP & DESSERT: 3570 Calories, 200 g Fat, 8127 mg Sodium, 288 g carbs, 127 g protein

WENDY'S
Double Baconator, Large Fries, Large Coke, Small Frosty
2100 calories, 95 g fat, 245 g cholesterol, 2630 mg sodium, 245 g carbs, 8 g fiber,  73 g protein

As you can see, there are some surprising things to notice.  Wendy's isn't that much worse - and in some cases it is actually better (since it's numbers include a frosty).  The two best, according to calories, are the Beef O Brady's Wrap and Five Guys (stunned, actually).  The worst?  Friendly's new atrocity.  The sodium in just about all of them are completely out of control.  Look at the "healthier option" Ted's salt content.  5874 mg of sodium?!?  That is two and a half days worth.  Also, across the board, you can nearly double your numbers by adding on the appetizer and dessert.  No matter what choice, you are going to just about wipe out an entire day's worth of calories, 4 days of fat, 1-3 days of sodium, a half a day of carbs, and about a day of protein with just ONE MEAL.  Again, that is if you don't put extra condiments on anything, get refills on soda, or add anything else on.  Kind of a startling exam, isn't it?

Well, I plan on doing a few more of these.  There are several foods I could compare, but I want to hear from both of you who read this.  What foods do you want to see compared?  Pizza?  Chicken sandwiches?  Salads?  BBQ Pork?  Put your opinions in the comments and that will help me decide on the next showdown.

WEEK TWENTY FOUR: Twists and Turns

I just finished Week 24 of this whole process.  This last four week cycle has been full of ups and downs.  I felt some of the worst temptation I have since the outset.  And I've had some of the most disheartening things happen - like losing peanut butter.  But, it also has been one of the best cycles.  I actually lost more in this cycle than in the last cycle - and almost as much as two cycles ago.  (I lost five and nine pounds in those.)  And I finally broke through the 280 level - which means I am now smaller than I have been since before I was married.

I have looked at some old pictures lately.  Our tenth anniversary is in August, and I have been bringing out some old shots from the wedding.  When I see them, I think several things.  One, man I looked stupid in round glasses.  Two, that close hair cut was pretty stupid for a person with a balloon head.  And three, I'm not that big.  We were in Tampa this past weekend.  That allows me to see pictures from the way back time machine - to get an accurate view of how big I actually was.  I still have a while to go to get to my college weight.  But I am already back to my circa 1998 levels (guessing about that year).

The peanut butter loss was a big problem.  Trying to find other options has been difficult - especially regulating the amount of those options.  I have pretty much landed on cashews.  I prefer the fancy jumbo whole cashews.  Why?  Because I'm a fancy jumbo kind of guy, I guess.  I have NOT gotten into the almond and cashew butters.  There are several reasons for this.  One, the money.  It is expensive to switch to those.  I had someone wanting to buy me a jar of cashew butter, just so I could have it and try it.  I turned them down.  That may seem silly, but it leads into my second reason.  I am doing fine without it.  I was able to get rid of the peanut butter (on threat of illness).  Why would I add back in something almost identical, but three times more expensive?  I'll stick with cashews and non-peanut trail mix.

I have found myself really enjoying dried fruit.  At first I avoided that, due to the sugar content.  But now I realize that eating it in moderation is fine.  I always have liked raisins and dried pineapple, but I got away from a lot of that over the years.  It didn't compare to donuts and ice cream.  Now, though, it is really nice.  Dried pineapple, raisins, blueberries, cranberries, bananas, coconut, papaya - all of that is good stuff.  I even tried a prune the other day and realized those are really tasty.  So, between the dried fruit and cashews, I have replaced the peanuts pretty well.

The other thing I finally buckled on is the frozen yogurt.  At first, I avoided it like the plague.  Too much like ice cream.  But now, it is just a good option.  The calorie count is not any worse than eating a container of yogurt.  And it is a great dessert.  Plus, have you tried these frozen yogurts lately?  Good grief.  I started with hitting the shops, just to get my bearings.  But I have bought some at the store lately.  I just am careful about how much I put in my bowl - and the bowl size.  If I want to get crazy, I'll cut up a banana with the yogurt and add cashews.  I bought Publix brand at first - their peach is awesome.  I got some chocolate for the kids and Heather, but I wouldn't eat it.  I was trying to avoid chocolate.  But I had some the other day.  It was really good and I did well with it.  This past weekend, Edy's was on sale at Publix BOGO (buy one, get one).  That took it to another level.  I got a chocolate vanilla swirl.  The other one I got was cookies and cream, but I won't eat that one.  My flavor was super.  They taste just like ice cream, but they have like 40% of the calories.  My personal rule is avoid the flavors with stuff in them - like chocolate chunks, cookie pieces, stuff like that.  But plain flavors or fruit ones are fine.

It has been a successful cycle, over all.  I have found some great food options (frozen yogurt, cashews, fajitas) to mix things up.  And I reached a major milestone.  I'm excited to see what the next cycle holds. Thanks, as always, for being a part of this with me.

Blah

I've been at this for over five months, now.  And I've seen lots of progress.  In addition to the weight loss, which has been pretty substantial, I also have completely changed my tastes and approach to food.  I have been surprised to find that I have not cheated even one time.  The only times I have even had the chance to mess up - when no one would have blamed me, when there were no other options, when someone messed up an order - I have actually stayed strong and not given in.  I've gotten to the point where food that I used to eat is just inedible to me.  It is too sweet or too salty.  In the last couple weeks, I have tried to eat some food from a New Orleans style place and from a Chinese place.  Both of them were so salty that I actually did not finish them.  It was almost like a layer of salt on my tongue.  Not very appetizing.

So, by all levels of evaluation, this has been a raging success.  I would have thought that by this point, I could have stood on the deck of a battleship and declared, "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!"  But, I have been quite surprised to find that - like that incorrect presidential speech - I would have been premature in celebrating.  The last few days I have had a very hard time mentally in keeping on track.  No, I still have not messed up.  But there has been almost a constant desire to.  Every meal, I want to just give up and eat something I shouldn't.  Each morning, as I get the kids' breakfast ready, my mind tries to get me to eat a Pop Tart or a waffle or some cereal.  And when I grab my yogurt, it is with resignation and disappointment.  With all of our standard summer traveling, it has been hard to keep up our meal routine.  It used to be that I would make something for dinner (pulled pork, london broil, turkey breast, chicken breasts).  That would generate enough leftover meat, veggies, and rice for me to have for lunch later.  But we have been thrown off our schedule.  So now, it has been hard to find lunch for me.

I make the kids' lunch, and then I have to find something for me - which is increasingly difficult.  Yesterday, for example, I made the kids and Heather grilled cheese sandwiches.  I kind of picked at a few things.  Pretty unsatisfying.  Dinner is usually okay.  If I have stuff planned, then all is well.  But when the days don't work enough to plan, well that is a problem.  I made the rest of the family pizza on Friday night. I had a yogurt.  You know how hard it is to sit there and make a pizza, smell the pizza, serve the pizza, and then see leftover pizza - all while knowing you get a container of yogurt?

All of this has been compounded by two other issues.  First was the peanut butter problem I addressed in my last post.  Since I lost peanuts and peanut butter, I lost a vital part of my routine.  Finding a replacement has been tough.  [By the way, I tested my peanut theory last night.  I hadn't had it all week and had some last night.  My mouth started burning and my throat felt like something was stuck in it.  I don't think it is worth playing around.]  I got a container of cashews and a back of tropical trail mix at Sam's.  They are soooo good that I actually snack TOO much with them.  I have tried to cut back, but it has been hard.  This all has contribute to the second issue.  The weight loss has, understandably, slowed down.  My last four week measurement cycle only saw a five pound loss.  This four week cycle will probably be around that.  I have been slowly drifting toward 280, but every so often I bounce back up a couple pounds due to salt or snacks.

This is very frustrating.  Friday it boiled over to some point.  On the 18th, I weighed 281.  On the 21st I was 282.  On the 25th I was 284.  (Yesterday I was back down to 282.)  Gaining three pounds in a week was so frustrating - even though I knew a bunch of it was sodium.  I kind of lost it.  "This is ridiculous!  I gain three pounds when I'm doing this right?  I even cut out peanut butter and gained weight?!? All because I had the nerve to eat some CASHEWS and FREAKING DRIED FRUIT!?!?"  That is very annoying.  If I had eaten a piece of a cake or cookies or a donut, I could at least understand.  "Well, I DID eat a donut, so I guess that is understandable."  But when I turned down those things and still went up?  That stinks.

Last night was the hardest night for me since the beginning of the whole process.  We went to Chick Fil A to give the kids a chance to play at the playground there.  I had planned on getting some BBQ on the way there, but that didn't work out.   From the moment we got into the restaurant, it was a mental war.  Just so you understand, even though Chick Fil A has a reputation as a better fast food place, it still has horrible options for me.  It is all sandwiches, with a few salads.  Their salads all are pre-made, so they have cheese on them.  And they come with a small amount of pre-cut cold chicken.  They never run sales.  And they are more expensive than most places.  For me, it is one of the worst options.  The only choice I really have there is a grilled chicken sandwich without the bun, with a bowl of fruit.  However, like at most fast food places, the grilled chicken is not very good.  It is small and very salty.  (It may not seem small when perched on a big ole bun with a huge side of fries.  But laying by itself, it looks pretty lame.)

The other problem is that they have a new spicy chicken sandwich.  It is fried.  If you have followed this blog, you probably understand the way my mind has always worked.  If a restaurant introduces a new sandwich that looks good to me, my brain will continue to come up with ways to try it until I have had it.  Usually, that happens within the first week.  Well, I wanted to try the spicy chicken sandwich.  But that was not an option.  It was fried, on bread, with cheese on it.  But there was a massive battle within my brain.  I didn't want the grilled chicken.  I wanted the spicy chicken.  However, the part that has changed kept on keeping me from getting the spicy.  I didn't order anything.  Heather and the kids ordered and ate.  The kids went to play.  The whole time there was a storm swirling in my head.  "Spicy chicken!  No!  Wait and get BBQ on the way home!  NO!  I WANT SPICY CHICKEN!!!  YOU AREN'T GETTING SPICY CHICKEN YOU FAT TURKEY!!!"  I knew it was getting later and we had to go to Target after, so getting BBQ wasn't an option.  Finally, I forced myself to go up and get two grilled sandwiches and eat just the lettuce, tomato, and chicken.  Just as I had expected, it was wholly unsatisfying and salty.

It is moments like those when it is very hard to keep this going.  I battle and fight and war.  I try to do things right.  There are so many conflicts in my head that no one knows about.  I feel guilty for eating too many nuts.  I think I'm doing something wrong for having "too much frozen yogurt."  Then there is stuff like last night, when I could have easily messed up and no one would have blamed me.  But I manage to stay strong.  And then I don't lose weight anyway.  That gets frustrating.  The challenge for all of this is realizing that it is not a short term option.  I can't take a break.  There is probably not going to be a day when I can have pizza or ice cream or burgers again.  This isn't just about weight loss.  It is about breaking the hold food had on me.  Weeks like this past one realize just how strong that hold really was - and how THAT mission is far from accomplished.

Double Down

I have been pretty insulting of the new KFC Double Down sandwich since it dragged it's lard butt onto the American fast food scene.  For those of you who are not familiar with this monstrosity, here is a basic description.  The Double Down is comprised of two fried chicken breasts, which operate as the bun.  Inside, there is bacon, pepper jack cheese, jack cheese, and some mysterious substance known as "Colonel's Sauce."  (There is a "healthier" version that uses grilled patties instead.)  It is being marketed as a "man's sandwich" that is so meaty it doesn't have room for a bun.  The thing looks and sounds horrifying.  It's nutritional information is terrible (540 cal, 32 fat g, 1380 mg sodium -- 460/23/1430 for the grilled).  But, like a train wreck or a torture movie, many people are drawn to it.

Then I found THIS ARTICLE the other day.  (Click on the link if you want to read it.)  This guy is way smarter than me.  He wanted to see if the Double Down was as bad as it appears.  So he constructed a comparison between it and a bunch of other fast food sandwiches (and burritos, I guess).  He added the fat, sodium, and cholesterol in the Double Down and put it up against those same things in other sandwiches.  That is what you see in this first chart.

What you see is that the Double Down actually doesn't fare that poorly - largely due to the fact that there are so many horrible choices for foods out there.  When compared to other chicken sandwiches, the KFC DD has six options worse than it.  And, when burgers enter the argument, it pales in comparison.  Look at the Wendy's and Hardee's numbers!  So, maybe the KFC DD has gotten a bum rap, no?  Well, the writer than goes on to point out that the problem is that the KFC DD actually is worse because it has fewer calories than these other sandwiches.  You are only getting 1/4 of the daily recommended 2000 calories, but you are getting more than 1/2 of the fat, sodium, and cholesterol.  You are getting less bang for your buck.  With the burgers, you probably will feel full for a little while.  With the KFC DD, you will be hungry - maybe even want a second DD.  (Good grief.)  Also, there is absolutely no fiber in the KFC DD, whereas the buns that it abandons brings SOME nutritional value.  This is shown in the second chart - basically dividing the calorie/fat/cholesterol number by calories.

When you look at thing this way, the only thing worse than the fried KFC Double Down is the GRILLED KFC Double Down.  That is because the sodium is higher in the grilled version and the calories are less.  [Trust me.  I tried the regular KFC grilled chicken a few months ago.  It is as salty as beef jerky.  It is horrible.]  The Double Down is even worse that a TRIPLE BACONATOR!  That just makes my jaw drop.  

So, I could have just posted a link to this guy's site.  Why did I bother to write all of this?  Well, I want you to look at that list again.  I have had 27 of those sandwiches before.  While I never have had the triple Baconator, I always ordered the double Baconator when I went to Wendy's.  I have tried the Quad Stacker - but usually got the Triple Stacker.  At McDonald's I would always order a Double Quarter Pounder - with extra cheese.  But it would also include a large fries and large Coke - sometimes with a Frosty or ice cream too.  I never thought about the numbers.  I just ate the stuff because I liked it.  Look at what I would regularly order at these places.

DAILY RECOMMENDED DAILY ALLOWANCE

2000 calories, 65 g fat, 300 mg cholesterol, 2400 mg sodium, 300 g carbs, 25 g fiber, 50 g protein

WENDYS

Double Baconator, Large Fries, Large Coke, Small Frosty

2100 calories, 95 g fat, 245 g cholesterol, 2630 mg sodium, 245 g carbs, 8 g fiber,  73 g protein, 

MCDONALDS

Double Quarter Pounder with Extra Cheese, Large Fries, Large Coke

1650 calories, 74 g fat, 167 g cholesterol, 1777 mg sodium, 196 g carb, 9 g fiber, 55 g protein

BURGER KING

Triple Stacker (no sauce), Large Fries, Large Coke

1610 calories, 77 g fat, 140 g cholesterol, 2120 mg sodium, 200 g carbs, 50 g protein

SONIC

Supersonic with Bacon and Cheese, Mozzarella Sticks, Large Cherry Vanilla Coke

1775 calories, 80 g fat, 211 g cholesterol, 2562 mg sodium, 200 g carbs, 6 g fiber, 69 g protein

TACO BELL

3 Cheesy Gordita Crunch, Soft Taco, Large Pepsi

2220 calories, 108 g fat, 210 g cholesterol, 3625 mg sodium, 249 g carbs, 21 g fiber, 73 g protein

CHICK FIL A

Two Original Chicken Sandwiches with Cheese, Large Fries, Large Coke

1640 calories, 65 g fat, 150 g cholesterol, 3250 mg sodium, 200 g carbs, 12 g fiber, 73 g protein

I didn't go through and find worse case scenarios.  That is what I usually ordered at these places.  I didn't even look up Whataburger or Arby's or Checkers.  I think that the point is made.  It is ridiculous.  The sad thing is that I was not some solitary self-destructive fatso that was doing this alone.  People all over the country eat just like this all the time.  I see what my friends post on Facebook that they eat.  I have eaten with people and had them get the same stuff.  We just don't even think any more.

The point is not whether or not the KFC Double Down is the worst fast food item ever.  The point is that there is actually competition for that position.  I was consuming far beyond what a normal person should eat in a day at one meal!  And so you would have to add another of those numbers for dinner.  And, might as well toss in breakfast too.  Look at those numbers!!!  It is no wonder I was fat.  I'm lucky I wasn't pickled from the inside out.  From the other side, I am horrified at how I used to handle myself.  I guess that I just wanted to give my readers a moment to pause and consider what they actually are consuming.  Go on one of the fast food sites and use their nutrition calculator to see what you really are eating.  Don't take solace in the fact you would never eat a Double Down.  Actually evaluate yourself honestly and seriously.  I wish I had.